Search

Sylvester

Cassandra Skully Massacre
Jan 12, 2015
2 min read

On my personal Facebook page I enjoy having some bizarre people as friends, it keep things entertaining and fun.

One day I get a friend request and message from a guy named Sylvester, who is a mutual friend with one of my current bizarre friends. All that the message said was “can we be friends?” Of course I need to collect more bizarre people, so I accept and message him back “sure”.

Within minutes of accepting the request he starts liking and commenting on all my pictures and posts. He tells me how beautiful I am, that I'm hot, cool, sweet, and that I am the best of friends. OMG what? We haven't even talked yet. He goes back to messaging me and starts sending me questions like we were potentially going to date, he also feels the need to describe his physical appearance. I choose not to respond and to do some Facebook stalking. Sylvester is in his late 40's, lives in Michigan, and he has one picture of himself that I had to search for and he is a creepy ass man.

I don't respond and about a week goes by and I get a text message from my friend Michelle stating “Sylvester is messaging me like we are potentially going to date”. Quick side step, on my Facebook Michelle is listed as my sister. So now he is hitting on my “sister” and me.

Another week goes by and at this point I completely forget about him, he stopped messaging and commenting on my stuff. Then one day I get this call from my mother asking “who is Sylvester?” So I explain to her the meeting of Sylvester and ask her why she is asking about him. HE STARTED HITTING ON HER! Now he is hitting on my mother, my “sister”, and me. My mom continues to tell me that he told her he wants her in his arms, and that he wants her to call him Big Daddy.

Seriously what is wrong with this guy!!! I'm not sure if he was hoping for a 4-some or if he is just dumb enough to think he could hit on all three of us and we wouldn't say anything to each other.

** Moral of the story: Don't be a gross creeper, or you won't have any friends!

THE MESSAGES